Things are about to get weird - Mongol Rally advice

We asked the Mongol Rally veterans what the one piece of advice they'd give if they could give themselves a pep talk just before the Rally. Some of the responses were far too useful so we deleted them. These are the best of the rest.

Apparently you can weld with two car batteries

Apparently you can weld with two car batteries

For those living on the edge, you can spot weld using 2 car batteries
— Alice Christine; I think therefore I ambulance, 2011
Pack less. Take out half your kit, leave it behind. Then take out half of what’s left. Then pack a spare pair of underpants, if you’re feeling fancy
— Ruari Rhodes; The Generation Game, 2009
Don’t eat the unpasteurized homemade sheep yoghurt!
— Charlie Peet; Carry on Stans! 2011
Eat the unpasteurised homemade sheep yoghurt.
— Rob Mills; The Gobi Dessert, 2009
Take nothing with you. You won’t need anything. Car and passport should do you.
— Nick Dodd; The Infinite Possibility Drive, 2009
Wet wipes. Pamper your butt hole and clean your face (not necessarily in that order).
— Mark Kendall; Team Don't Stop, 2009
Learn to poop outdoors. Do this from now on so you get comfortable, then build up to doing it from a car window. The rally is very much like Mario Kart.
— Dave Williams; The Mongolian Taxi Service, 2008
Also always pee into the wind. It’s offensive to Mongolians if you don’t.
— Nick Dodd; The Infinite Possibility Drive, 2009
You don’t need to take all the shit you pack.
— Jonathan Bell, L'Austin Transit, 2009
Its illegal to kill teammates no matter how stupid they are.
— Tove Grønbæk Jensen; Corpus Callosum, 2013

So there you have it. Priceless advice from the ones that blazed the trails before you. Follow this advice and you can't fail to not never make it most of the way to Mongolia.

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